eighteen.

it has just dawned upon me that I have not given much thought to the fact that I am a year older now.
And I think i'll just make this post clear and direct to myself.
Being seventeen has been eye-opening. Events, people, emotions, everything just suddenly rained on me all at the same time. So it started off exciting and new. Until it reached a point where i wanted it to just stop. To a point where i didnt know how to face any of the situations anymore. I jumped from being needy, from wanting people to listen, to seeking desperately for advice and comfort, to the phase where i just wanted to be left alone. I have been unsteady. I know I have made a lot of mistakes. I know there were times when i've mistreated people. I know i've not appreciated some people enough.
I've done many things I now realize were immature and unnecessary. I've made small things seem so big and devastating. I've prioritised the wrong things. I've been angry for the smallest reasons.
But i know better now. Being eighteen, to me, means that i can look back at the seventeen me and learn from the mistakes.

i'm sorry cheryl, rebecca, ivan, boom, midori, mum, and whoever else i may have wronged.
i'm sorry for being selfish.

On the night i turned 18, i was given a very special gift. An unforgettable memory. A reason for me to smile and look forward to being 19, 20, 21, and so forth.

I guess Life, can be pretty good if u make it be.