what is enough?

just got back from a talk by the CEO of UC Rusal, from Russia, the biggest aluminium manufacturer in the world. i had a hard time trying to understand his accent. but successful as he may be, in the end he seemed to me only human. this morning i had my accounting test.
this is the first time my hands have shaken so badly throughout an entire test that i could barely write. i think my "kiasu" level is increasing by the day -_- cant help it, the environment is forcing us to become like this. it's either he gets the A+ or you do. stupid "curve ranking" system.
I need to start deciding what i want. I don't have the slightest direction at all currently as to what i want as my career. i need to identify my path so that i can stop wandering along this path of no clear target.
i am amazed by people who can do or say things that i am yet able to do. i want to be a lot of things. i want to know that i'm doing more than enough, but i don't know what is enough, because it seems to me that whatever i'm doing, everyone else (well almost everyone) is doing too. i attend 3 talks, i see the same group of people attending them too. i go to the library to study for hours, but that's what 7 floors-filled-with-students are doing too. they're crazy. i mean, why is the library on a sunday afternoon completely full? every study cubicle is used up, and i had to walk through three floors to find one available table. how can one not feel pressurized?

if you're not kiasu here, you really will su.

and and on a completely separate and unimportant note, why is it that every time i develop a slight interest in a guy, it turns out that he has a gf? :P