life

i remember there was a time, i would contemplate a lot about life: what we live for, what's our purpose, why are we here. i dont know whether it's because I realized people around me were pondering on the same question and coming up with the same conclusions (or none at all), that i've stopped thinking (because i found it kinda silly that all of us should be confused over the same thing); or whether its because i was tired of going in circles, tired of feeling frustrated and upset, and making something big out of something small. or maybe its because i've found my answer, that i've stopped contemplating.

my answer at this point is that there is no definite answer. at every stage of your life, even every single day, there is a different answer to those questions. you may be the president of america, or a fireman who saves hundreds of lives, or even a construction worker, you do big and impressive things, but i don't think that was the sole reason you were born.

i think we live for today. today is here so that we can reminisce on our past. today is here so that we can look forward to the countless opportunities that the exciting future has to offer. today is here, and thats the reason you're alive.

taku, my dog, is a very good example to me. every morning, she wakes at 6am, rushes to the garden and does her daily patrolling of her territory to make sure no frog or lizard or neighbour's cat is intruding, once assured, she trots back into the house, greets every member of the family goodmorning by jumping on us. then has breakfast. plays with a towel for 2 hours and shreds it into a million pieces. takes an afternoon nap. goes for a sun tan. catches frogs and releases them. barks at every dog that walks past our gate. goes for a car ride with mum to come pick me up from school, she absolutely loves this. takes another nap. shreds another towel. has dinner. sleeps like she's dead, in my arms.

she does the same things every single of her life. and she's the happiest creature i have ever met. such simple pleasures, and she doesn't ask for more. i have never seen her upset (other than the times mum shouts at her, but she takes about 5 seconds to recover). taku reminds me that there are so many reasons to be happy.
there isn't a need to question why you here, when you are happy. and this kind of happiness has an amazingly powerful effect of helping you look at things from a different perspective whenever something isnt going right. of recovering, perhaps taking longer than 5 seconds, but still recovering faster than everyone else.

i hear my parents arguing over whether i should go to hong kong or uk. whether i should become a lawyer or a businesswoman. this used to be very important to me, it still is. but now i see it isn't everything. it doesn't matter where i go or what i become, as long as i still remember what i'm thinking of today: i'm living a life. and no one thing equates to life as a whole.

sometimes i keep silent because i'm so happy with what's going on inside me. in these silent moments, sometimes i have a lot in my head, but sometimes, my favourite times, there's nothing in my head at all but a complete calmness.

i wish you would join me.
:)